TALK THE TALK

TALK TWO 4/5/09 DREAMS


If we continue with the idea of dialogue, our dreams can be seen as part of our internal dialogue. They are a conversation with our unconscious minds - our subtext, the back story so to speak, of our lives. As much as we are impacted by the interactions we consciously perceive, we also are affected by bits and pieces of our history. This can include something as obviously powerful as the dynamics of our birth families or as seemingly insignificant as a visual image from a movie that we saw last week. This is material that has not been assimilated into our conscious vocabulary.

Dreams are wonderful allies in helping us understand why we make some of the choices we make and have some of the feelings we have. They can help us problem solve and fill in missing pieces of our personal life puzzles. Dreams talk to us about the back story and help us integrate it into our present.

We create our own dreams. What does this mean? One way to comprehend this is to look at yourself as both the author and the director of your dreams. Think of them as theater pieces that you are producing. And as with any performance, you are using actors and props to make a point – to get a message across to your audience. Only in this case you are also the audience.

There are probably as many interesting ways to interpret dreams as there are dreamers! Did you know that in the 17th century the Iroquois Indians used dream interpretation as part of their decision making process. At the beginning of the day, families often shared the previous night’s dreams with each other. If they got stuck figuring out the meanings they would consult their shaman and ask for help. Dreamsharing often became a communal activity that helped reduce tensions and resolve conflict within the tribe.

Today we use some of the very same methods as the Iroquois to access the meanings and wisdom of our dreams. One way we can do this is to realize that since we wrote the “script” every thing in the dream is a facet of who we are. We can integrate these parts of ourselves by acting the part of the dream object.

For example, if you dream about a horse you might act this creature out by saying to yourself: “I’m the horse in my dream and I’m big and powerful and I often carry people on my back.” Right away you are getting some feedback about how you perceive yourself. You can continue to build this description of yourself as your dream horse and see what evolves.

Another option would be to begin a conversation in your head between your dream horse and your day-time self. This might go something like: “Hey horse, what are you doing in my dream?” And then you can let the dream horse answer. It might say something like: “I’m trying to give you a clue, buddy. You’re pretty powerful but all this carrying people on your back is getting to be a drag!” What might this tell you about how you’re feeling and changes you might need to make in your life?

We can do the same thing with any objects in our dreams. Remember you put them there. So for instance, if you have a tree in your dream you can repeat the same process you explored with the horse. Describe yourself as the tree. What characteristics do you have? Then talk to the tree and start a similar type of dialogue to the one you had with the horse. What would you ask the tree and what might it answer? This way of “working” with your dreams is richly informative, allowing you to recognize personal attributes that you may not have been aware you possessed.

If you are a person who enjoys visual images you can draw pictures of the objects in your dreams. Just looking at them will stimulate thoughts and ideas. You can also share these images with a friend and ask for their take on your dream – always remembering that while it is a fun way to share, they will probably be telling you more about themselves than about you.

Keeping a dream journal is also an intriguing project. Just keep a pad and paper next to the bed and give yourself permission to spend your first waking moments as special time between you and your dream memories. Remember that you don’t have to write everything. Even a tiny dream fragment can yield a plethora of interesting information.

For those of you who think you don’t dream, or have trouble remembering dreams: As strange as it may sound, try talking to your dream self before you turn off the light. You might say something like: “Please give me a hand here and show up for me in the morning. I’d like your help.” Try this as an experiment and let us know what happens.

And finally we come to the issue of nightmares. What are they? Is it really possible that our own unconscious mind is being that nasty? Let me share a dream that I was recently told and see what you think.

“I am walking through the streets and there are hundreds of snakes. They have their fangs out and I am sure they are going to bite me. I’m trying to be really careful, but finally one of them gets me. It hurts and I am afraid of the poison going through me.”

Sounds pretty scary, right? So imagine what would happen if this dreamer began to take on the identity of “his” snakes. I’ll give you a clue and tell you that this dream happened the night after a particularly powerful therapy session. Another interesting clue is that in ancient cultures snakes represented wisdom and healing. It’s interesting that we often use ancient images, archetypes, in our dreams. With all this added information, what do you think this person‘s dream was telling him? Check out one of your own “nightmares” with this new perspective. What do you find?

PLEASE SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS AND DREAMS WITH US. JUST CLICK ON “COMMENTS” AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS TALK.